April marked six months for us in Spain. (Actually it was seven months, but let’s not count that first month living in a hotel.) After a few weeks in our house I wrote about what the experience of moving to a country felt like and how change is often difficult. When we talked to others that had moved to overseas, six months was the magic number. Give it six months they said. You will probably hate it for six months, tolerate is for a year and love it after that. This can easily apply to any move or major change, not just moving overseas. Six months into any situation can bring perspective.
And guess what – they were right. We would probably even be ahead of the curve from tolerating to loving it. Obviously we don’t love everything, but there are many things to love about living here. The sunshine topping the list. Even in a short time, I have learned a lot but not at all the things I was expecting to learn. I have been able to look at our lives from a bit of an outside perspective.
So here are six things I’ve learned so far on this side of the ocean.
1.I Can Live Without Target and Chick-fil-a
Seriously. As shallow as it sounds, it is true. Don’t get me wrong, there are times I would love nothing more than to see that white and red sign and to be able to order a number one with lemonade and kids meal instead of making dinner, but we are ok. Now, I do have a strong Amazon supply chain for some things, yes, but Spain has food and stores and everything we need to survive. Somethings are different and not my favorite, but I want to shed the idea that I can’t live without the familiarity of only things in America. I can love it and enjoy, but I’m not crippled without it.
2. Everyone Loves a Cheeseburger
On the flip side of number one, it is shocking to see how American culture has permeated other parts of the world. McDonalds operates in 119 countries around the world. We have McDonalds, Burger King, Taco Bell, Dominos, KFC, TGIFridays, and Five Guys here in Valencia. (Addison almost went to blows with a boy who tried to compare KFC to Chick-fil-a.) American songs play through the speakers in stores and brands like Gap, Nike, and Under Armour are readily available. Thera are Crossfit Gyms. The movie theaters look exactly like theaters in the US, playing all the big name Hollywood movies. You can even watch movies in English on certain days. We can watchThe Big Bang Theory, This is Us, Fox News, the World Series and the Super Bowl on our Spanish cable provider. For better or worse American culture and capitalism has at least small stake in every corner of the world.
3. Americans Use A Lot of Energy
If Europeans get an A+ for energy conservation, Americans get an F. Listen, I bleed red, white and blue, but the vast majority of Americans don’t care about energy conservation and most of the world mocks our efforts. I never realized the attitude of my own heart in this area. I would have never hung my clothes out on a line in the US. I would have said, “My convenience is more important. As long as I can pay for it, why does it matter how much energy I use.” I probably wouldn’t have even been able to articulate it that well because I simply never thought about it. It is eye-opening to see an entire continent that willingly operates with little air conditioning, even in the hot summer months, and drive tiny cars simply to conserve energy. I’m not saying I’m completely converted in this area, but I have had a shift in perspective. If recycling, hanging my sheets out to dry and turning my thermostat up a few degrees helps to peel back some of my self-entitled spirit, it’s worth the effort. In the past I’ve shrugged off climate change and the environment as “not my problem.” Setting aside the politics of that debate, I do believe I need to be a better steward of the Earth because the Lord has called us to be good stewards of His creation. I want to teach my kids that more and bigger is not always better and sacrifice for the sake of stewardship is always a win/win.
4. Americans Are Safety Conscious
As you live in other cultures, you begin to adapt in some ways and grow to appreciate or even accept the norms of your adopted land. There are however some things that are so ingrained, that they will never change. (Like I’m never going to get use to dinner at 10:00PM. I just can’t.) As a whole, I had no idea how safety conscience we are as Americans. (My parents are the reigning king and queen of safetyville, so I probably have an extra dose of all things safety related.) The reason for this American obsession is debatable, with fear of litigation probably topping the list. Every house here has a pool and virtually none of them have fences. My American brain can’t even fathom who thinks that this is an acceptable way to live. Playgrounds harken back to the playground of the 1970’s and 80’s in the US with few railings, metal rails and dangerous apparatuses of all sorts. Then there are the roundabouts. I can’t decide if they are just an independent view on driving: people are adults, they can handle it or if it is just a layer of survival of the fittest and population control. The upside to a less safety focus culture is a more carefree attitude, clearly seen throughout all of Spanish culture: enjoy life and don’t worry about all the what if’s.
5. Americans Work A Lot
America led the world in innovation, technology and development through much of the 19thand 20thcenturies. While some of that balance of power may be shifting, America is still the power house of innovation. If you watch the movie Hidden Figures, you understand why we got to the moon. It wasn’t luck or chance – it was hard work. My friend Michael Phelps passed his competitors because he was willing to work longer and harder than most of them. For most Americans the drive for greatness is inherent. Sixty-hour work weeks just feel normal to us. Why settle for mundane when you can be anything you want to be?
In our time in Spain, I have come to see that while there are many amazing things that come out of the American spirit and drive, there is a cost that comes with it. Here Chad works less than 30 hours a week on average and gets 22 holidays and multiple weeks of half days. Does this organization accomplish as much a unit in the states that works double that amount? Certainly not. However, do Americans tip the scale to sacrifice all on the altar of productivity and output? Probably so. Every American we have met in Spain have a common theme – they came here to get out of the rat race of the American cooperate world. They saw an opportunity to live in a culture that valued something other than output.
6. Change Isn’t Always What You Expect
I can’t write a full discourse on what I’ve learned in Spain because obviously the process has just begun. However, I do think the lessons are going to be different than we anticipated. I expected to learn a language (that reality is still totally up in the air), experience new places and then jump back into American life just like I had never left. While I will gladly use my dryer again one day, I hope we never return to life as normal. From what I have observed Spaniards value two things above all else: family and time. While certainly no society is immune from the drive and lust for money and power, I can see a distinct difference in what this country values. Stores are closed on Sundays because they value something else over profits. Life shuts down during the month of August because rest and time with family is highly valued. Dads are present at practices and family dinners because there is a different value system that structures work hours differently. Chad doesn’t work 13-14 hour days in the US because he doesn’t value his family. He works long hours because the culture is designed in a way that mandates it. Two-hour lunch breaks and siestas are the norm here because productivity is not the ultimate goal in life. Can the US military operate on a 4 ½ hour work day and still maintain the most powerful military in the world? Probably not. However, every industry, company and individual can learn lessons from a culture that places a higher value on family and time than on productivity and output. Even as a mom and a writer, I have much to learn in this area. All too often I am a slave to my to-do list or my kid’s schedules. It feels completely normal when everyone around you is spinning in a similar cyclone. However, when all of sudden you are the only one spinning, you stop and wonder why.
I am a proud American and love so many things about my country and culture, but I’m thankful for the chance to reflect on it from the outside. I hope we never jump back into the rat race in the same way because in the end the core of who I am is not an American. I am a child of God and He is using this circumstance to teach us thing we could have never seen in the US.
You may not be able to pack up and move to another country, but we can all stop and examine our lives. What’s keeping you plugged into the rat race? What would have to happen to things to change?